5 Things to Avoid in Trauma-Informed Marketing (And What to Do Instead)
A significant portion of your potential customers are trauma survivors. It's something most marketing experts don't discuss, but the statistics are clear. And it matters more than you might think. Many common marketing approaches can unintentionally create distance instead of connection.
This isn't about tiptoeing around or diluting your message, and it’s certainly not about being “politically correct.” It's about recognizing that trauma-informed marketing is simply more effective. When your marketing respects people's nervous systems and builds real trust, you create sustainable growth without relying on manipulation or pressure.
So what does this look like in practice? Here are five things to avoid—and what to do instead.
1. Don’t: Use Shame and Fear to Sell
What this looks like:
Marketing that hammers pain points without offering genuine support or a clear path forward, and language that positions your customer as behind, inadequate, or falling short.
It shows up everywhere."This is why you can't close sales." "Your competitors are succeeding while you're stuck." Headlines that ask "Are you making these embarrassing mistakes?" or "Why you're still broke/single/unsuccessful.". Before-and-after photos that shame the "before." Copy that says things like "If you haven't figured this out by now..." or "Everyone else already knows this."
Here's what's actually happening:
Shame activates brain regions involved in threat detection and emotional distress. These same areas can be activated in trauma responses. For someone with a trauma history, shame-based messaging can trigger their nervous system. The body registers threat.
When someone experiences shame, their thinking shifts. Shame triggers cortisol release, which research shows can impair the part of the brain responsible for decision-making and rational thought. Shame based marketing might drive an impulsive purchase, but here's the real cost: buyer's remorse, self-sabotage, poor outcomes, and virtually zero chance of building loyalty.
Do: Lead with possibility.
Show people what becomes available when they have the right support, rather than cataloging everything they're doing wrong.
Acknowledge real challenges without catastrophizing them. Position your work as support for someone's journey, not a rescue operation for their brokenness.
Here's what matters: your customers aren't broken. They're navigating complex lives and seeking genuine help. This shift protects trauma survivors and strengthens your relationships with everyone.
2. Don't: Create False Urgency and Scarcity
What this looks like:
Countdown timers that mysteriously reset. "Only 2 spots left!" for a program that never actually sells out. Weekly "last chance!" emails. Tactics designed to force immediate decisions through pressure can trigger wounds that hurt your customer and your business.
Here's what's actually happening:
Many trauma survivors have experienced the pressure of making a decision before they felt safe or ready. We call this manipulation or coercion. False urgency marketing techniques replicates that exact dynamic.
It also activates hypervigilance, where someone constantly scans for danger or deception. Once they spot the manipulation (and trauma survivors often have highly attuned instincts for this), they won't just doubt that one campaign. They'll question everything you say.
According to trauma-informed care principles, the pressure to decide "right now" removes the sense of safety and choice that people need to make an empowered decision.
Do: Use urgency only when it's genuinely true.
If your offer is evergreen, say that. If you have a real deadline or limited capacity, be transparent about why.
Create space for empowered decisions. Try something like: "This program starts on [date]. I want you to have time to consider if it's right for you. Here's what you need to know to make that call."
Trust that the right people will say yes without being cornered. Those who need time often become your most committed clients because they operated in clarity, not panic.
3. Don't: Ignore Consent and Boundaries in Sales
What this looks like:
Relentless follow-up that ignores clear disinterest. Surprise sales calls after someone downloads a simple free resource. High-pressure discovery calls. Reframing every concern as an objection to overcome rather than a valid feeling to honor.
Here's what's actually happening:
Boundary violations sit at the center of many traumatic experiences. When your sales process ignores expressed boundaries (pushing after someone says no, calling without consent, treating concerns as obstacles rather than information) you're recreating an unsafe dynamic.
This teaches potential clients something crucial: you don't respect their autonomy. If boundaries aren't honored before someone becomes a client, why would they trust you to honor them after?
Do: Build consent into every stage.
Build consent into every stage. Be crystal clear about what happens when someone opts in. "When you download this guide, you'll join our weekly newsletter. We'll send three additional emails this week with resources. Zero surprise sales calls."
In sales conversations, make genuine space for concerns. "I hear you're worried about [X]. That's valid. Let's explore whether this is actually right for you, not just how to move past that worry."
Take "no" gracefully. "I appreciate you considering this. If things change, I'm here. If not, I genuinely hope you find what you need."
Respecting someone's "no" creates conditions for a future "yes" when they're ready and when trust exists.
4. Don't: Exploit Vulnerability Without Providing Value
What this looks like:
Marketing that spotlights wounds to position the seller as the sole healer. Emotional manipulation disguised as testimonials. Content that dwells on pain without offering substance. Transformation promises that create dependency. "Free" resources that are really extended sales pitches.
Here's what's actually happening:
Many trauma survivors have experienced people who identified vulnerabilities specifically to exploit them. Marketing that excavates pain just to make a sale, without offering real, substantive help, registers as predatory.
There's also the false rescue dynamic. Positioning yourself as the only solution, the hero who'll save them, can trigger people who've learned that rescuers often have hidden agendas.
Do: Lead with actual value.
If you offer a free resource, make it genuinely useful, not just an appetizer calculated to create hunger.
When addressing challenges your clients face, balance reality with agency and possibility. "Many people struggle with [X]. Here's what I've seen work..." This acknowledges difficulty without dwelling there.
Be honest about what you can and can't do. "I can help with [specific thing]. I can't fix everything, and you'll still need to show up. Here's the support I offer."
Position yourself as a guide, not a savior. The most empowering message is: "You have what it takes. I'm here to support you in accessing it."
5. Don't: Be Inconsistent Between Words and Actions
What this looks like:
Marketing that promises one thing while delivery looks completely different. Hidden fees in fine print. Authentic-feeling marketing paired with aggressive sales tactics. Community promises that evaporate after purchase. Social justice language used as branding without aligned action.
Here's what's actually happening:
Trauma often involves betrayal. Survivors have a history of experiencing people or systems who say one thing and do another. Inconsistency between promise and delivery doesn't just disappoint trauma survivors; it can genuinely activate their threat response.
Many trauma survivors have developed keen awareness around trustworthiness. They watch for red flags. When your marketing says "authentic, transparent, trauma-informed" but your sales process feels pushy, that gap confirms a fear: this isn't safe. This damages individual relationships and long-term brand reputation.
Do: Align your entire customer experience with your stated values.
Your sales process, onboarding, customer service, and actual service delivery all need to reflect your stated values. This isn't about perfection, it's about integrity.
Be transparent about everything. Pricing. What's included. What the experience will actually be like. How you handle concerns or complaints. The more transparent you are upfront, the safer people feel.
Walk your talk. If you claim to value consent, respect it consistently. If you say you're different from aggressive marketers, actually be different. When there's alignment between what you say and what you do, trust builds naturally. And trust? That's what sustainable business is built on.
Ready to Build Marketing That Actually Feels Good?
If you're recognizing yourself in any of these patterns, or if you're ready to create marketing that builds genuine trust without manipulation, I can help.
I work with women and queer entrepreneurs to develop trauma-informed marketing strategies that honor your values while driving real results. Together, we'll uncover what's been holding you back and create an approach that feels sustainable and effective.
Marketing doesn't have to feel gross. It can feel aligned, authentic, and genuinely respectful of the humans on both sides of the exchange.